


Impressions of the Intimidating Pecan Man

by Anonymous



Category: Hermitcraft RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Character Study, Fluff, M/M, Ren does a little bit of introspection about his feelings and relationships, but no angst because cmon, for some people?, friends being friends, the slash is important and very present verbally so keep that in mind
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-05
Updated: 2020-04-05
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:55:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23488699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Ren's boyfriend is not as scary as everyone thinks he is. He just hasn't taken the time to convince them yet.
Relationships: Renthedog/Docm77
Comments: 11
Kudos: 114
Collections: Anonymous





	Impressions of the Intimidating Pecan Man

The first person to bring it up is Iskall, a blissfully short moment when they're having lunch. Iskall seems to have just come back from another one of his favors around town, motor oil streaked in an incredibly good looking mess across his forehead. He's just finished explaining how that happened when the conversation dives into new territory, and he pointedly says, "That boyfriend of yours looks really scary. Is he?"

He asks in such a way like Ren is supposed to be bewildered. Like he'll say, 'Oh, thanks Iskall! Hadn't noticed myself despite the fact that I see him up and close on a daily basis and you've only glanced at him from afar. Nope! Thank you ever so much.'

Ren blinks.

"Nah," he begins, instead. "He's quite awkward most of the time, actually."

Iskall makes a face of bewilderment.

"Look man, I'm not one to judge based on appearances. I mean, I get the guy! Cybernetic eye? Yup, I know how that feels. I'm not scared of that, if you were wondering."

Ren shakes his head, eyebrow raised.

"But why on earth did you go after a guy who is a foot taller than you?" Iskall's sort of laughing when he asks, but Ren can't tell if it's his happy laughing or nervous laughing.

"A foot minus two inches, dude," he corrects, smiling, just to egg Iskall on further.

"Same difference! Dude! I don't get it. I like tall women too but not someone double my body size."

"I get it, he's tall," Ren says, and now he's laughing. "I mean, he's a little freaky when he gets serious but it's not like he's a serial killer."

"Maybe not a serial killer, but the man's got weapons," Iskall goes on. Ren raises an eyebrow again. "An arm like that? He's probably got a switchblade hidden in his wrist."

"Or a laser," Ren supplies helpfully.

Iskall makes a sound of disagreement.

"Be real. If he has a laser, it's gonna be in his eye."

Ren fully laughs out loud at that. The image in his head is spectacular. The man can hardly keep his balance standing still. The force of a laser shooting out of his head would probably lead to a concussion.

"I. Am. Serious Mr. Diggity! Even without fancy cybernetic enhancements he could probably just pick you up and throw you off a cliff."

"Only if it's into the ocean," Ren agrees. "That'd be a fun thrill trip, actually. We should get a group together and do that in the bay some time."

Iskall groans.

"You're missing the point! That man is a lot stronger than he looks."

"Oh, I know how strong he is."

Iskall makes a face and Ren starts laughing again.

"Please no. Ugh, fine, I get it. Your super scary boyfriend is actually super not scary at all, despite certain events that may or may not have occurred last summer and his overall-ness."

"Yup! You should talk to him; it's a better method than egging and greasing his porch, and it'll probably make you feel better," Ren encourages, and he really does mean it. He would like his friends to actually get to know his boyfriend instead of brashly making assumptions because he has an evil scientist looking wardrobe and an arm to match, or whatever encounters they had with him during the prank war. And because he's tall.

"You're probably right," Iskall concedes. "I guess I should."

"You should," Ren agrees, grinning, and he pats Iskall on the back.

  
:::

Grian brings it up next, when they're at the beach. Grian isn't one of his super closest friends, but Ren likes to help him out with odd jobs or pranks. Like now, for example. Ren is crouched in the shallow water, digging his hands in the sand and collecting the tiny mussels that appear when the tide pulls back. Grian holds a waterproof pharmacy camera, snapping photos of the animals in Ren's hands.

They've been at it for about twelve minutes, and then Grian's camera runs out of film so they call it a day. Ren stands up and washes his hands free of sand with brackish water, and Grian pockets the camera.

"Let's go check out the rocks," Grian says, jabbing a thumb towards the aforementioned place.

"Aren't you out of pictures?" Ren asks.

Grian shrugs. "I just wanna look. You down?"

Ren nods.

They've been walking in silence for about a minute when Grian perks up.

"So...you're dating that guy from STAR."

It takes Ren's brain a hot second to decipher what the hell that means, and then it finally clicks. The prank war from last summer. Why did it seem like that was the only reason any of his friends had met him? The war had been incredibly intense but incredibly fun, ending with a clash on this very beach that Ren probably still had a couple bruises from. Stress could be very clever sometimes and it scared him.

Despite the few injuries it had caused, because they were all a bunch of stupid young adults, he had enjoyed that summer very much.

"Yeah, I am," he responds after his brief reminiscing.

Grian nods.

"And this isn't, gonna like, cause any problems between us?"

Ren raises an eyebrow.

"Of course not, dude. Why would it?"

"I dunno," Grian shrugs. Ren suddenly stops, worried. Does Grian have bad memories attached to the civil war? Is he still upset about something STAR did to him? 

"I just," he starts again. "I was just concerned that if you dated him, you'd be reminded of certain events that may or may not have occurred last summer, and then you'd be reminded of how badly your team lost!"

His mood changes like a light switch has been flicked.

"What?" Ren asks, again speaking before his brain has time to catch up. "Wait, dude! We did not lose badly! We lost totally graciously!"

Grian laughs in that malicious sort of way of his, something more akin to a cackle.

"If that's what you want to call it. You wanna know what? I think I spent a solid five minutes just looking around your guys' base after I captured the flag," he boasts, putting a hand above his eyes and glancing around the area for emphasis.

"We were distracted! We didn't know you'd try something as stupid as a solo mission," Ren argues in response, and Grian laughs again.

"Stupid, but effective."

"A pretty good summary of most of the things you do," Ren responds. He grins at Grian's exaggerated gasp of offense.

"You take that back! Just because it's true doesn't mean you have to say it!"

Ren yelps in surprise as Grian grabs after his tail suddenly, and then they're running down the beach towards the rocks as Ren stumbles about gracefully and Grian laughs manically. Never let it be said that despite his tendency to panic, Ren knew when to run.

Eventually they settle down and reach the rocks, so he's granted mercy. That both sit down on the black boulders under the boardwalk and catch their breath. Ren thinks it's a nice place to rest. It's a good area to watch the sunset or observe birds pick at old sandwiches.

"Thanks for helping out today," Grian says after awhile.

Ren nods nonchalantly.

"No problem. I hope you get a good grade."

Grian looks over at him and shakes his head. "No, these aren't for school. Joe needed pictures because we wanted to make a mussels and clam exhibit, or something like that."

"Oh. I hadn't heard yet."

Which is fair. While he's fairly integrated with staff and happenings of the Hermit Bay Research Center, he's not priority. He designs nice exhibits and helps out with events and makes sure the place is in working order, but he's no scientist. Or junior scientist, by the looks of it. He tries to push any bitterness down.

"Well, you should come see it if you're not going to be working on it," Grian offers. "Bring your boyfriend, so we can meet him for reals."

Ren perks up.

"Oh, okay, he'd probably like that." 

There's a brief silence, and then Grian turns his head away, looking sort of tense. Ren raises an eyebrow.

"Are you okay?" he asks.

Grian hums thoughtfully.

"I am, I just..." He turns back to Ren, a look of hesitance on his face. "He's like, a good guy, right? I don't want to say anything rude about him, but he was pretty intense over the summer. He's...a normal dude, right?"

Ren smiles, half comforting, half amused.

"Dude, we were all pretty intense during then. I was so scared Stress was actually going to kill me. She may act terrified but there is an evil hidden behind those eyes."

Grian barks a laugh at that, and Ren can barely catch his jumbled "Really?". He doesn't blame him. Stress is completely sweet and warm (ironic) until she has a reason not to be, and then it's truly shocking how harsh and crafty she can get (intentional or not).

"He's like that," Ren starts, and then backtracks. Okay, maybe not quite Stress-levels of nice. No one is getting up there. "He's similar. He acts all tough sometimes, and yeah, he can be, but a lot of the time he's a huge dork. Don't let the voice fool you. He's honestly worse than me sometimes."

Grian smirks.

"God, I feel bad for anyone that's 'worse than you'. He's lucky he looks the way he does or no one would take him seriously."

They both laugh easily, and Ren is glad the tension has lifted.

"I'll bring him," he agrees, and Grian nods nervously. "I'm sure if you guys talk to him, you'll see he's pretty cool."

"So I'm not the only one who's intimidated?" Grian questions.

"Nah. He is pretty intimidating," Ren admits.

Grian snorts. "Well, at least you can see it."

He stands up, pats off his pants, and offers Ren a hand. 

"Love truly is not blind, ey?"

Ren laughs at him, and they shuffle off the rocks and up the hill to the boardwalk.

  
:::

It, as always, comes down to False. She's the last one to confront him about his super scary boyfriend, and is both the only person that has had a formal conversation with him and the reason he decides he needs to put an end to the accusations about the man.

"We haven't really talked that much, though," False is saying. The two of them are sat at her desk in Lab Two, strongly ignoring the water sample she'd collected that morning. "Even during the civil war, we mainly talked strat. He seemed like a fine guy."

Ren frowns.

"Just fine? Why just fine?"

False smiles, patient and just a little bit smug.

"Ren, I told you, we didn't talk that much, okay? He was a very polite guy and he came up with some good plans. I don't know what else to tell you."

Ren groans dejectedly and rests his head on the desk. False flicks him in the ear.

"Get up, I haven't sanitized today."

"I don't care," Ren pouts. "If I get sick it's okay because you don't even like my boyfriend."

False chuckles at him, rolling her eyes.

"Well I'm so glad you need my approval, you adult man."

Ren looks at her, and he sees her amusement, and suddenly he feels very, very shameful. Because he is an adult man, and he is allowed to make choices for himself, and he and False are practically the same age so why is he asking her of all people, and he just can't keep his stupid thoughts to himself, can he?

He abruptly sits up from her desk, pressing the heels of his palms against his eyes. 

"Jeez, Falsie, I'm sorry. This was really dumb of me. I'm super sorry," he apologizes. Color bursts beneath his eyelids, and False pulls his hands away from his face.

"Hey, don't do that. Look, Ren, you don't have to apologize. I wasn't making fun you. I just thought it was silly that you were seeking my opinion on your relationship. It doesn't feel like my place," False tells him. Ren blinks rapidly as his eyes readjust.

"You want to know what I think of your boyfriend? I want to know what you think of him."

Ren stops blinking.

"False..."

"Ren." She gives him a firm look. "What do you think of him?"

Ren resists the urge to pull his wrists from False's grasp so he can rub at his burning cheeks. He looks over her shoulder, and there's still no one else in the lab, so he releases a long suffering sigh and returns her gaze.

"I like him a lot," he says quietly. "I think he's cooler than I'll ever be, and I think I've liked him for longer than I've realized, and I think he tries really hard a lot and that's really important, and that he's funny even if he isn't trying to be, and I think I really like how when he holds my face one of his hands is warm and the other is cold."

He pulls his hands away to hide his face and False genuinely laughs.

"Aw, that's really icky and sweet at the same time! You have a crush on him!"

"He's my boyfriend!" he retaliates.

"And you like him!" she sing-songs.

She chuckles once more, and Ren watches, though a slight frown remains on his face. When she opens her eyes again, her expression matches his.

"Ren, I'm being serious," she begins gently. "It seems like you like him a lot, and you look happy, so that's what's important. I didn't get much of an impression of him during the civil war. I thought he was some stoic, seething, mafia boss German guy that showed up one day and wouldn't leave no matter who asked him to."

"Why does everybody think that!" Ren exclaims. "He's not like that all the time!"

"Then show us," False presses, resting a kind hand on his shoulder. "Let us meet the guy outside of a hostile setting. If you get along with him, I'm sure he's way less scary than we all think he is. Well, not scary. Intimidating. He's one of the tallest guys I've ever seen, he's intimidating."

"You're right there," Ren concedes, once again finding it hard to disagree with the height logic. "You're always right, Falsie, and that's why I come to you. Because you make me seem less dumb, and because as my best friend I want you to like the people I like."

False smiles at him.

"Well, that's awfully nice of you. And don't worry about it anymore, ok? You're not dumb for being worried, even if you are for a bunch of other things. I'm sure he's more than 'just fine'. Just bring him by sometime and we'll have lunch or look at snails or something. Does he like snorkeling?"

"I'm sure he does."

"It's a date, then," False announces, and she smiles so toothily and sunny that Ren can't help but smile back.

  
:::

"It's ridiculous really," Ren concludes. The recount had been relatively short, but he feels like he talked too much anyways. 

Doc, contrarily, looks incredibly amused.

"Intimidating, really? I should thank your friends. They are very flattering," he teases, and Ren kicks him lightly under the table.

"If you act like that, they're not gonna believe me at all."

Doc laughs lowly.

"I'm sure I wouldn't be able to keep it up for too long," he says, poking absently at his plate. "Snorkeling? I wouldn't be able to stay serious for long at all. Have you seen the little hermit crabs on the beach? They are so cute."

Ren smiles at him.

"Yes, all the time during work." He pauses for a bite of paella, and when Doc doesn't say anything, he restarts. "Are you saying you'd be down to go?"

"Snorkeling? Or the Center?" Doc asks.

"Both," Ren answers.

"Then both," Doc decides. 

"Even after what they did to your porch?"

"Not all of them did that to my porch. Besides, it was all in good fun, right? I didn't have to clean up by myself. I had you guys help me out."

"Yeah, you did," Ren agrees, nostalgic, and Doc leans over to plant a quick kiss to his forehead.

"You arrange a time with False, and then we go to the exhibit whenever it opens."

"Okay, sounds good." He pauses to eat again, and Doc waits for him to resume patiently. 

"Y'know, I'm really glad you agreed to do this. Is that dumb? Like, if you just agreed to hang out with False I'd be happy, but I'm extra happy you want to with everyone else. Is that dumb? Is that weird?" he continues, anxious.

Doc chuckles, not unkindly.

"Of course not. I assumed I'd meet up with them again at some point, sooner or later. I don't need your permission or anything, but I'm glad you'll be introducing me to them as a friend."

"As opposed to a foe," Ren checks

"Yes," Doc confirms, very firmly. "You guys helped me with the porch, but that doesn't mean it was fun."

Ren laughs. "Oh, God, no, it was horrible."

Truly, it was. And not entirely thorough. Sometimes he can still smell grease when he's waiting outside Doc's door. A timeless, uncomfortable tattoo of sorts, one that Ren is endlessly happy was gotten

"Are you going to stay tonight? We can watch a movie or something," Doc asks, and he's looking at the clock above the dining table. Ren nods.

"Sure! I'll clean up, but pick something either really good or really bad, okay?"

Doc gets this soft look over his face.

"You're making me feel like a bad host. This is probably the third time you've done this."

"Imagine being ungrateful when someone offers to wash up for you. I don't mind it, you know I like busy work," Ren assures him, ignoring the hitch in his throat. "Pick a movie, okay? And we can talk about all the porch eggs and hermit crabs you want."

Doc laughs, like its the easiest thing to do. It makes Ren feel things, things he doesn't often like to think about, but lately, been finding easier to do so. When he tells Doc they'll talk about hermit crabs and porch eggs, and he asks if they can go snorkeling, he means it more than ever before. Everything is making him so flustered all the time, so full of thoughts, and he does his best to present it in the most open look he can manage, only hoping to match Doc's own.

"Okay, you've swayed me," Doc says, smiling like he understands, and he leans over to kiss him once more.

Ren feels unbearably happy, and he once again finds it hard to believe how anyone could find the man scary.

**Author's Note:**

> Hmm.
> 
> An induction into the Hermitcraft fandom, particularly and possibly only this series. This fandom is a very scary one to write for, even without any direct tumblr experience. I just wrote this to get it out of the way, to let you make your impressions as quick as possible. I don't want to say I sway to either side of the argument, just that I have my own personal boundaries and this is about as far as I'm willing to go. And if this one fic is enough to turn you away, I don't blame you in the slightest and I hope you find something you'll enjoy more.
> 
> I just want to write something lower effort for awhile (this was another one day, barely edited thing), and not get stirred up into any debates. Perhaps this disclaimer and fic are inviting that, but I want to include it because I don't want people to think I'll be harshly aganist them on either side. Just that I'll be sitting here, in the middle, open to any comments and critisim as always.
> 
> Au revoir and adieu.


End file.
